Self-sabotage: What does it mean in relationships?

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Many of us struggle to make love work, and a common reason for that is self-sabotaging in our relationships.

Diane Arbus states, “Love involves a peculiar unfathomable combination of understanding and misunderstanding.”

It can feel deeply distressing and painful to struggle with self-sabotage in relationships because we are relational beings and often want deep intimacy but find ourselves feeling blocked from having that very desire.

The problem, as Dr. Ron Frederick explains in his book “Loving like you mean it,” is that many people’s brains are running on outdated programming. 

Bethany Cook, clinical psychologist, and health service psychologist, validates Dr. Federick stating that relationship challenges often have deep roots.

This article discusses what self-sabotage in relationships is and why it happens.

You will learn how to spot the signs of self-sabotage and get practical solutions to stop self-sabotaging from destroying your relationship.

The intention is that you get the deeper intimacy and love you desire and deserve.

What is self-sabotaging in relationships?

Self-sabotaging in relationships is when you unconsciously behave in a manner that moves you further away from an intimate connection with your partner. 

In many cases, when somebody has self-sabotaging thoughts, behaviors, and actions, it leads to them sabotaging their own happiness in addition to the happiness of those they love.

Self-sabotaging is a destructive behavior in relationships. People experience self-sabotage in both long and short-term relationships. This unhealthy dynamic can take place in an isolated relationship or form part of a collection of multiple relationships (self-sabotaging relationship patterns).

For the sake of our sanity, health, happiness, and well-being, it is highly important that we educate ourselves on what to do when somebody is self-sabotaging in a relationship.

We must learn how to stop self-sabotaging behavior before it destroys our relationships.

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