Family time over Christmas can bring tensions to the fore – and make unhappy partners more likely to cheat. And with January then always seeing a spike in break-ups, can couples get over an affair?
Sex and relationship expert GEORGETTE CULLEY gives her tips on how to survive – and thrive if you are the one who has strayed.
SEE THE POSITIVES: While there’s no denying affairs hurt everyone involved, once out in the open they can be a wake-up call and force both parties to look at their relationship honestly.
FIGHT FOR YOUR LOVE: Remind your partner why you love them and send them a memory book of your favourite photos together.
CUT TIES WITH LOVER: There’s no way you can stay friends with the person you’ve been having an affair with. You must promise to cut all contact immediately.
BE HONEST (UP TO A POINT): Answer any questions your partner has but leave out any unnecessary hurtful details. For example, don’t mention your lover was great in bed.
GET MARRIAGE COUNSELLING: Don’t discuss with friends how to move on – they will be biased and make the situation worse. See someone independent who can give impartial advice.
TAKE RESPONSIBILITY: Don’t blame your partner for your behaviour. Own up and face the consequences.
SHOW EMPATHY: You’re hurting, but imagine how your partner feels. Be compassionate.
BE PATIENT: Don’t expect instant forgiveness. When someone has been betrayed it takes time for them to trust again.
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