Best marriage advice from a Father to his Son

Marriage advice, when they are positive, inspiring and without prejudice, tend to be the best gift everyone, young or old, can get from their parents because a spouse comes into your life to either support or destroy you.

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Marriage is a contract that should be honored for a life time although there are cogent reasons and justifiable circumstances where a divorce becomes necessary – not in line with teachings from the Bible, anyway.

A life partner should stay by your side at all times and against all odds: for success, growth and blessings. Couples should lean on each other, depend on each other for their needs, show understanding, and make a life together.

While relationship counselors say marriages are partnerships that should be nurtured to become the most powerful tool in everyone’s life, it is unarguable that some overlooked traits such as deceit, disloyalty, extravagance, disrespect, infidelity and manipulation, in every form of it, are love-killers.

Nobody in a once-sweet relationship would easily let go until true love gives way to contemptuousness from either or both parties for different reasons, and where this is the case, with hateful opinions and advice pouring from different sources, the need for comfort, hope and stability becomes a launchpad that either redirects or enforces wrong choices with harsh, irreparable consequences.

Here are a few words from a father to his son: 

  1. My son, if you keep spending on a woman and she never asked you if you’re saving or investing, and she keeps enjoying the attention, don’t marry her.
  2. My son, a woman could be a good wife to you, some could be a good mother to your children but if you’ve found a woman like a mother to you, your children and your family, please don’t let her go.
  3. My son, don’t confine the position of your wife to the kitchen. Where did you get that from? Even in our days, we had farm-lands where they worked every morning . . . that was our office.
  4. My son, if I tell you that you’re the head of the house, don’t look at your pocket; look if you will see a smile on your wife’s face.
  5. My son, if you want to have a long life, let your wife be in-charge of your salary, it will be difficult for her to spend it when she’s aware of the home needs and bills to pay but if it’s in your care, she will keep asking even when all has been spent.
  6. My son, when I threw little stones or whistled at the window of your mother father’s house, to call her out, it was not for sex, it was because I missed her so much.
  7. My son, remember, when you say your wife has changed, there could be something you’ve stopped doing too.
  8. My son, your mother, she rode the bicycle with me before I bought that tortoise car outside there, any woman that won’t endure with you in your little beginning should not enjoy your riches.
  9. My son, there is this thing you people call feminism, well, if a woman claim to have equal right with you in the house, divide all the bills into two equal parts, take one part and ask her to start paying the other part.
  10. My son, I met your mother a virgin and I took more yams to her father, if you don’t meet your wife a virgin, don’t blame her, what I didn’t tell you is that our women had prestige.
  11. My son, your mother have once locked up the cloth I was wearing and almost tore it because she was angry, I did not raise my hand to beat her because of a day like this, so that I can be proud to tell you that I never for once beat your mother.
  12. My son, your mother and I are not interested in what happens in your marriage, try to handle issues without always coming to us.
  13. My son, remember I bought your mother’s first sewing machine for her, help your wife achieve her dreams just as you’re pursuing yours.
  14. My son, don’t stop taking care of me and your mother, it’s a secret of growing old and having children to take care of you too.
  15. My son, pray with your family, there is a tomorrow you don’t know, talk to God that knows everything, everyday.

ADVICE for WOMEN:

Don’t talk bad about your husband to anyone ever. Most of the people listening to your rants really don’t care; the most they do is laugh, or complicate your woes by exploiting the situation.

You already have the advice you seek from others. Pray, find peace with your maker, weigh your actions and contributions to the problem, and focus on resolving issues with him.

If necessary, seek professional advice.

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