Look Before You Poop, A Snake Might Be In There!

A Thai man is currently recovering in hospital after he was bitten by a nine-foot (three meters) python while relaxing to poop on his toilet sit, a report said. A few persons have suffered such attacks around the world, so it’s time for everyone to peep right before you poop.

The man named Attaporn Boonmakchuay reportedly suffered a three-inch (eight cm) wound after being bit on the penis–of all places–by the snake. Thank good heavens the reptile didn’t chew.

Attaporn Boonmakchuayrecovering in hospital

It took about half an hour before the unlucky man could pull open the snakes jaws to take out his ‘property’ and hit the door for good. The goddamn snake had crawled up through the plumbing.

Mr Boonmakchuay painfully described how he fought the snake off as his wife sought help. It wasn’t that easy fighting with a nine-foot snake, holding its jaws.

The man explained that even after a neighbor came to his aid with a knife and rope, the snake refused to let go of his ‘things’. According to the report, the man only managed to free himself after the python momentarily lost its strength.

He said: “All of a sudden, while I was holding it, it began to lose some strength so I used my hand to prise open its mouth. Then the snake released its grip by itself.”

Luckily, the 38-year-old needed only stitches and medications. Medical staff say he should make a full recovery soon.

A doctor from the Chachoengsao hospital, near Bangkok, said that victim was “lucky”, adding: “if the bite had gone into the urinary tract it would have been a big problem.”

Rescue workers kater freed the snake and released it

It was a hard job for rescue workers who arrived the scene after the horrific incident. They could only take out the reptile after breaking the toilet with hammers.

Reports say large snakes are common even in urban areas of Thailand, particularly during the onset of the rainy season when they leave flooded areas for drier ground. However, most of the snakes hardly attack humans.

Probably, this particular one was provoked after it realized what the man had planned to do on it–snakes can smell it miles away. Holy sh**!